Failness.com » Featured Creature

Losing My Marbles

luke — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 00:29:30 +0000

“Something is missing, something is missing, I can’t put my finger on it but I know I forgot something when I left my house…..that’s it! I forgot my wallet in my other underwear. Geez, where is my head sometimes?!”

Texas

Eat Mor Chikin

luke — Sun, 12 Jun 2011 00:24:07 +0000

Chick-fil-A is not going to pay you for dressing up like a cow and walking around…trust me, I’ve tried…

Florida

Southeast: #12 The Real Joe Dirt Vs. #13 Mrs. Roboto

luke — Sun, 27 Mar 2011 00:11:22 +0000

Kinda like old school versus new technology here. Although she isn’t really a robot and that haircut wasn’t ever cool, but whatever.

Please cast your vote in the comments!

Ringing In The New Year With A New Store

luke — Sun, 09 Jan 2011 03:44:28 +0000

While for some reason we here at PoWM were not invited to the ribbon cutting ceremony, we feel like the grand opening of a new Walmart store is a grand opening for us here as well. So we would like to congratulate ourselves on a new store opening! Yaaaa us!

South Carolina

Stranded On The Island

luke — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 00:56:08 +0000

You do realize that by looking like this you alone are using up the per capita crazy of Rhode Island right? I mean, if this was California we could easily sneak you in unnoticed, but if this is how you wanna use up your allotment Rhode Island then I’m not gonna stop you.

Rhode Island

Bubba Koosh

luke — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 00:07:59 +0000

Ohh someone got Pinky ON their brain. By the way, are those Koosh balls? Because if those are Koosh balls on your head I might take back anything mean I’ve ever said about you because I love me some Koosh balls!

Florida

Go Away Elvis

luke — Sun, 05 Dec 2010 01:21:48 +0000

“Thank ya, thank ya very much”…..Stop thanking us Elvis! No one is complimenting you! Go change.

California

Workin’ The Pavement

luke — Mon, 22 Nov 2010 01:00:19 +0000

Honestly, how much trouble is it to shave your face after you shave your legs?!?!?! Put in the extra effort people, it goes a long way!

California

A Cowardly Wave To You Sir

luke — Wed, 10 Nov 2010 01:19:18 +0000

Wait wait wait wait wait….you’re telling me people won’t actually buy those dvd’s?!?!?! Shocking.

Kansas

Grab Your Partner

luke — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 00:12:55 +0000

A line-dance….in Walmart…..in Missouri. I can’t make this sh*t up people. Sometimes I feel like they are doing these things just for me! So grab your partner do-si-do, then step on up and shop some mo’!

Missouri